Podcast E14: The Soul's Journey and Energy Work

The E14 podcast, "The Soul's Journey and Energy Work," takes us on an in-depth exploration of the soul's nature and its integration into the physical body. Mette Miriam Sloth presents her personal experience and understanding of the concept of the soul, and how it is connected to body consciousness, energy work, and epigenetic residues.

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  The Nature and Longing of the Soul:

  The soul is described as a higher form of consciousness that exists independently of the physical body and does not die with it. It is the source of unconditional love and has a deep longing to fully incarnate in the body to experience life in all its fullness.

  In contrast to the soul, which is free and unlimited, the body is bound by physical limitations, pain, and mortality. This contrast can lead to conflicts and imbalances when the soul's longing to experience life collides with the body's need for safety and protection.

  Mette Miriam Sloth sees the soul's integration into the body as a gradual process that requires patience, practice, and a deep understanding of the needs of both the soul and the body.

  Darkness as a Guide:

  The E14 podcast emphasizes the importance of recognizing and integrating the "darkness" – the painful emotions, traumas, and unresolved experiences that are often hidden away in our subconscious.

  Instead of trying to suppress or ignore these feelings, Mette Miriam Sloth encourages us to meet them with openness and compassion. Our painful feelings are not enemies to be fought, but messengers that show us the way to healing and growth.

  By shedding light on our darkness, by allowing ourselves to feel and process the painful emotions, we can release the stagnant energy and create space for more light and joy in our lives.

  Energy Work as a Catalyst for Release:

  The E14 podcast presents energy work as a powerful method for releasing deep-seated traumas and blockages in the energy system.

  Energy work involves working with the electromagnetic field that surrounds our body and which contains information about our experiences and traumas. With the help of energy vision, a skilled energy worker can identify and release blockages in this field, thereby creating balance and flow in the energy system.

  Mette Miriam Sloth especially recommends energy work to address traumas that originate from past lives or epigenetic residues, as these are often too deep-seated to be processed through talk therapy alone.

  Final Reflections:

  The E14 podcast presents a unique and thought-provoking approach to understanding and integrating the soul into the physical body. It encourages us to see our painful experiences as opportunities for growth and release, and to explore new methods, such as energy work, to create balance and harmony in our lives.

• English transcription

  Translated transcript of the original Danish podcast

  Hosts: Mette Miriam Sloth & Sune Sloth

  Yes, the reason I've actually started talking about this is because talking about island soul and island stuff like that is not new in my life. It's actually, I would actually say it's what I spend the most time on, and it's what I've been working on since I was in my early 20s. Before that I was a smoking atheist and I didn't want to have anything to do with anything like that. Um, and it's like my own journey, it's not that I'm going too much into it, because it's not supposed to be so much about that, but it's mostly to give a bit of a background as to why I'm talking about this now. And the reason why I haven't talked so much about it over the years, well, I've worked with attachment connection is my recurring theme in everything I do is about connection, but I've focused a lot on the psychological aspects of child attachment in relation to relationships, relationship dynamics and also personal development, so connection to ourselves. And of course, what happens when we feel disconnected as in anxiety, depression and so on. So this is what we've been talking about for years. So you could say I've perhaps been a little more underground with my spiritual orientation or whatever you want to call it. And it's not really about me not standing by it. It's more about the fact that we have to operate, as I see it, we have to operate on all levels. I don't see that we can avoid dealing with what I call spirit or soul or spirit or existentialism. It's not so important what we call it. And it's also not so important whether you consider yourself a believer or not. So it's really it's really it's really a uh it's really a personal journey. It's a personal conclusion to find out where you stand in relation to trying to make sense of the fact that we are humans born on such a small planet in a seemingly infinite universe. It's mind-blowing sometimes when you start trying to understand humanity and life in a larger context. And it's not that I'm coming to any conclusions about it. As I see it, we just can't help but relate to it. And it doesn't have to be put into a Christian or religious framework. For some it works and for others it doesn't. So it's not that important, and you can easily be an atheist or you know, a hardcore biologist or something else. What it's really about is the feeling. It's the state of feeling connected to something beyond your own existence. And in that kind of connection, there can also be a sense of feeling that you are connected to other forms of consciousness than yourself. In other words, other octaves of consciousness. And this is quite well documented in the very psychological and the transpersonal, you could say at least in accounts of what you come into contact with in the form of meditation or something else. There can be guides, there can be angels, there can be all kinds of forms. And it's not because I'm going to say that you have to see or be aware of or connect with some other entities in a different way. It's just to open up to the fact that this universe is there. I would say that as humans, at some point, life will hurt in such a way or we may experience some powerlessness or meaninglessness that makes us reach beyond ourselves. We want to understand ourselves meaningfully in a universe bigger than our own little navel. Um, and that's healthy and good. What we end up concluding on that journey, uh, there are so many nuances. And what I'm experiencing right now, you could say that's where I'm at in all this, there are so many detours you can take here. There are fairies, there are angels, there are all kinds of things. And that's not at all what I find so interesting. What I find super interesting is what I'm always dealing with, which is my Achilles' heel and my biggest passion. It's this, what is it that happens when we feel disconnected? The pain that comes with that, the powerlessness, the disconnection that comes with that, and how the hell do we get back again? And the way I see it, it's a spiral, that this opening up and feeling more and more connected to yourself, to others, to life, to the cosmos, to the earth, to you name it, to whatever you want to be connected to, seems to be infinite like our universe. To sight seems to be infinite. And it's pretty mindblowing to realise that. It's also incredibly painful because when there are openings, you realise there are other places that are closed. So I think if we look at life, we can kind of reduce it to a simplistic, oversimplified way and say it's really about, you have like there's like two ways of operating. We can be in life, in relationships and some of the things that happen in life. We can close and remain closed or we can open. So there is actually this thing about whether we close or we open. And it sounds very simple. It's actually relatively simple, but damn hard to put into practice because what the hell are we made of? I mean, what are we made of as humans? Are we just biological beings that die last, or how is it all put together? And I don't have a definitive conclusion on that. But what I've learnt on this journey, where you could say my mission has been, how the hell can you come back when you feel closed, when you're in pain, and really focus more on that than focusing on understanding the whole, because the whole is so overwhelming. And what I've experienced, which seems to correspond quite well with many of the stories that have been told, as people who have meditated or played with spirituality for many years, there seem to be some basic patterns in some of what you experience. And what I have personally experienced is that there seem to be at least two types of consciousness in being human. There's the body consciousness, which is actually very different from soul consciousness. So what seems to be soul consciousness and what the hell does soul mean? And I could almost spend a whole hour defining that. I'd really rather just do it a bit exploratory for you and say, well, it's as if we contain some notes of something that is a little wiser than our own ego. So it's as if there's an opportunity to connect with a part of us that communicates to us in ways that work differently than the way the body communicates to you. And if you look classically, there has long been what is called the body mind split. In other words, some people focus on the fact that the mind can control everything. For example, right now in our Danish reality, there's a lot of focus on metacognitive, for example. So this idea that we can cure anxiety and everything else and that we can just get a handle on maps and I don't agree with that at all. Of course we can do a lot with our minds. But much of what's in our body, much of what's noisy in our body cannot and should not be controlled by the mind. Much of the noise in our body is about the evolutionary journey we have been on. So you could say it's like the evolution of consciousness. Evolution of consciousness, which I would also say is what possibly also constitutes the soul. So the soul is actually also towards or fragments, souls, fragments of consciousness, which are perhaps soul groups. In other words, we have something that is consciousness, which does not seem to die. It doesn't die with the body that you can make contact with. And it feels very different when you have contact with it than it does when you are actually taking care of the body. The body consciousness works differently. So we can say there's maybe an evolution of body and an evolution of consciousness, and the two actually want to play together. And then you could say, if we look at it historically, that play has been quite confusing. For example, if you look at Eastern traditions, it's very much about the body being a prison that had to be transcended. It had to go somewhere, and in Christianity or in some of the major world religions, you would have found periods where there was a lot of tormenting of the body. Torment of the body's needs. Torment of the body's sexuality. It's as if it has been the whole, if you go back and look at the whole of Adam and Eve, there's a lot there. At least that's the interpretation of it, that this poor body is totally sinful, and it's only the pure shawl or the pure thought that seems to think you're something about it, and of course it's nonsense, of course it was nonsense, so there's been a war very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very for a very long time in relation to this what the hell is what and instead of going into such a theoretical discussion about it, I really just want to invite you to uh some of you who are listening may already be working with a concept of soul because if you didn't then what I have written about here in recent weeks leading up to this will have been nonsense to you so it will not at all, it wouldn't have interested you at all. And that's also why, when I work with people, the level of soul and past lives or epigenetics, which I will also come back to in relation to working with the redemption of it, I don't go into that at all unless there is a resonance with people that they want that level, because I have a personal conviction that we cannot avoid that level. I have a personal conviction that we have to take care of the body, we have to take care of the mind, we have to take care of psychology. And we also have to take care of the soul. And that's really why I'm now starting to write about it and talk about it, because I just don't see how we can avoid it, no matter how you feel about the concept of soul. So it's used in so many different ways, and sometimes these concepts can be a bit thin, or it can be like, what the hell am I supposed to do with them? But as I see right now, I kind of have to get out of the bush, because I've just realised that if we really want to get to grips with some of the themes that we face as human beings, it's my experience that we as humans have some themes with us, maybe one or two themes with us, that are so difficult or that appear in so many variations in your life. And you'll probably already, when I just say this, I could think like, well, it's your theme where you keep feeling like you're banging your head against a door. It could be something like having some kind of anxiety about something you can't find reasons for in this life. Or it could be deep, deep pain or deep anxiety about losing, which yes, yes, there can be a bit of that, it was my own theme, it was something about trusting people all the time and I had reduced it to seeing now, but it was probably because I had a traumatic birth and I was in the hospital alone for 17 days and stuff like that and I had no doubt that it has not been fucking good. But I can see that the more I've worked in depth with some of the things in my own life that have been difficult and that many of the things I've experienced in this life have not been traumatic. They have been retraumatising in the sense that they have been like a catalyst to push something up that went much, much deeper. And it wasn't because I necessarily wanted to work with these things, because they've been pretty disgusting. Um, so it's not that you want to stick your hand into such a viper's nest, but it's more that if you step out into life again and again and again, and there's something that hurts, and there's something relational that hurts, or there's something in everyone, it's typically in the relational. Whether it's with colleagues or with friends or with family, intimate partners, with children. So it's typically there when you feel the pain, and you realise where the hell, what are these places I keep hurting like crazy. I would say the greater the pain or powerlessness or confusion or that they leave anxiety marks for days, if you bump into a specific situation with one or more people, then that's a good indicator that it probably goes deeper than this life. And here we go from a somewhat meta concept of soul, which for some people is just obvious and for others is something of a plate, to another concept which for some people is obvious and for others is really something of a plate. And it's this thing about past lives. And therefore, when I say past lives, I'm not so much talking about the theoretical stuff, although there is actually some research on it that is pretty cool and pretty well documented if you want to look into it. And I can link to that later. But it's again as I experience it with the fragments I've seen and been in contact with in relation to myself and also with some of the people I've worked with, it has appeared in a form where it resembles past life experiences. In the sense that it's an image of yourself that is a place where you get a little bit of insight into, you're wearing different clothes, or you know, you have a feeling that some sensations come into the situations that kind of indicate like hey, but it's not for this life. Well, it's quite, it's quite, um, it's quite different, so you're typically in no doubt. And then of course there's this, can we say scientifically whether it's early life and it's just like that, so it's maybe not such a square conclusion that it is, so what I'm interested in is whether there's a resolution when we get hold of it, so I'm not curious to find out how to document and conclude that yes, there is past life that's not what I'm looking for there are others who think there's a lot of nerding around trying to prove and stuff like that and that's fine umm what I think is interesting in the only reason I'm really interested in it is because sometimes we really have to go down into the depths to fish something out, bring something home so that it can be released, because that release makes you able to be in this life. So the way I see it, the past lives or what I call epigenetic residues to me or collective archetypes, if we use the Jungian approach. So there are several different ways, several different ways of trying to explain what this is. And that's also why some people get completely stuck on something like past lives. And that's why I have this thing about it, you don't have to call it that either. It's not that important whether it is or not. Because we know that epigenetics not only affects our genes, in terms of how we are affected by diseases and so on, but also affects our behaviour. So how our ancestors felt, what opportunities there were to have trauma released, that has an impact on how you feel today. We know it's there in terms of behaviour. How exactly it relates, what kind of trauma you bake your family lineage and what your brothers and siblings do and stuff like that. It's mind-blowing. We haven't even mapped that out yet. And that's actually one of the reasons why I've spent many years exploring many other healing modalities than just the psychological knowledge. Because you could say that I have a degree in psychology and I dabble a lot in the psychological and nervous system and brain and blah blah blah blah. And that's definitely important, but I've spent just as much time, maybe more in terms of actually exploring both shamanic and ritualistic healing modalities, also in terms of not so much faith, but trust. In other words, actually seeing yourself as part of something that is meaningful. What that meaningfulness looks like for the individual. Because in relation to the many shamanic ways of working, they are much more advanced than those who have worked all the time to purify the family line. So you could say they actually have many of the answers to what researchers in epigenetics are trying to prove, because they just have this, well of course I can, they just have this, I can see it energetically, I can see there's such a long lineage, I don't need to prove it, I can see it energetically, then you have energy vision. Those who have energy vision are just like that, we see it all the time. It's like that, and then you can choose whether you believe it or not. But you can say, because again I've been kind of like, I simply have to figure out what the hell are we doing here if we're imprisoned and it can be PTSD, and it can be imprisoned by trauma for existing lives. But what I often observe is that when there is a lot of that, at least in the part of the world we live in, because that part of the world is actually quite peaceful, it has been fucking dangerous to be human on this earth, as in indescribably dangerous. Um and that's also why a lot of it, if you have first incarnated many times or have a lot of epigenetics with you carry a lot of the collective development and all that has been there then you will have a lot of accumulated trauma and then there are all kinds of reasons why some have more than others or some seem to be more mature than others in the sense that they seem like they have a lot of wisdom with them. Rule of thumb. If you have a lot of wisdom and if you're quite sharp at recognising patterns and such intuitively and have a pretty good sense of group dynamics and understanding people and such, then there will also typically be a fairly high degree of anxiety, feeling wrong, weird associations. It's like the sharper you are, and I don't mean pure intellect, but the sharper you are in terms of actually being able to navigate and understand something and learn to navigate. As shamanists say, it makes you difficult to kill. So when the more mature you are, the more experience you have with you, whether it has arisen over many lifetimes, or you have it from your family line epigenetically, pick your choice. I don't interfere with that. It's entirely up to you which explanation you like best. That is, the more you have with you, the easier it is to navigate as a human, the harder you are to kill. So you, you come upstairs as a person, you find ways through what's difficult, the more you will typically struggle with very difficult things. A lot of anxiety, a lot of worrying thoughts, a lot of jumpiness, it's like it comes with the territory. And that's because life experiences don't come for free. Um, and that's probably why in spiritual circles there's a hypothesis that souls incarnate to learn. So they incarnate to go to school down here on earth and gain a lot of experience and then get the fuck out again and do something else in another universe and stuff like that. Um. And it's a bit, if I'm being honest, it's a bit rubbish, as my husband used to say, it's a f****** bad school that's been made. So because you know, if we look at people, well, it's a bit tired, right? Well, it's a bit tired when it comes to embracing learning and getting your finger out and making some obvious changes. So it's just a matter of distributing resources on the ground to all people. So we know very well from a logistical point of view, but there is enough food and we can get enough food, but then there is something about some money and something and we make a lot of mistakes. So you know, it's not that it's a bad school, but we don't learn shit. And I'm actually more in favour of the hypothesis that the soul or consciousness without a body. That is, the consciousness that doesn't have a final physical starting point, that doesn't transform and turn to dust and resurrect, that isn't part of life, death and rebirth. Because you could say consciousness also seems to have that in relation to the fact that it can actually be moulded, but it doesn't change in the same way that the physical body does. And what I experience when I'm in connection with soul consciousness, which feels very ecstatic, I would actually say the potential for unconditional love is, in my opinion, something that comes via soul. So it's there. It's not in the biological body. The biological body is much more alliance-based. But that's why the biological body can have a longing to be loved unconditionally. But this is actually something it learns by having a soul meeting. So you could say they actually offer something very different. They are very different. They must be very different. Um, and I also think that's why there has been so much trouble over many thousands of years in understanding this, that either it's hedonism, so it's only pleasure that we cultivate, or it's something about the body being evil for whatever desires and needs it has and stuff like that, and because there is a huge amount of just looking at sexuality, that it is something most powerful and enormously transformative energy. That's also why you can actually use sexuality to heal, it's actually a healing modality in relation to healing a lot of the trauma that lies in the body. The things that are just risk. Whenever there is a huge healing potential, something hugely transformative, there is also a huge risk of retraumatisation or further damage. And that's why it's such a fine line to walk when we talk about healing, redemption, potential for retraumatisation. So this business of getting a consciousness, a non-corporeal consciousness to land in a limited body that has an end and that has pain, that hurts, and that you need to find find find find find find find direction in life. It's an incredibly complex project. Whoever came up with it? Whether it's the earth Gaja's longing combined with the longing for consciousness. Who knows? I would actually recommend that you go in and meditate on how you sense that this longing for these encounters can often be depicted mythologically as the feminine seeking the masculine, not as archetypes. And that's what I want to build up to, you could do a whole lecture on that in itself. I still want to come back to the reason for talking about these things. It's because the encounter with the higher consciousness, and I don't want to say that the body has a lower consciousness instead, because then it's like we've already said this is good and this is bad, and that's bullshit. So we really need to deflect that. It's two different beings who are trying to understand each other and who want to dance gracefully together, but in trying to understand each other, they can very quickly end up stepping on each other's toes. What I discovered that was new in the last few years that I've been doing, well, it's probably been the year where I've worked most deeply in relation to my burning desire to understand epigenetics, which I realised really arises in me, and I've often seen that as a past life with you. Erm, but my curiosity, I was actually more interested in epigenetics. I had actually assumed that epigenetics had been, you know, interpreted as past lives. But I just have to, and that's why I haven't talked much about early life, because I wasn't like, ah, it's ah, I don't really know if it makes sense. But you know, I couldn't really explain the fact that there seem to be different degrees of wisdom in different people. Some people have some wisdom with them that you can feel it. You can just feel it on the spot, and others they seem to cone around, but are just as they should be, so there's no judgement on any of that. And that part I've been like, it's been such a stone in my shoe and just like, how the hell do you explain that? Where what what what where is that piece? And I have to say, if it's something like that, that we actually believe that the soul incarnates several times, if that's the way we explain it, then there's some kind of redemption in it, because then it makes sense depending on how many times you've been there, you get more and more life experience because you get to try more things. And again, this thing about I'm actually experiencing what the soul wants, it's actually living. It's actually incarnating deep into the body. It's actually getting down and trying to have a bodily experience of everything that's going on. So it's not something like, no, now I have to go down and learn about how to be human. No, it's actually about living as a spirit in the individual now. And that's also why my husband has teased me a bit about the headline with these ways of living. That's actually why I chose the headline for this lecture because there can be something about how we think everyday life is boring as hell and then we hunger to go on retreat twice a year to have some highlight experiences just like that no now I was completely ecstatic what if we can get that ecstasy into everyday life what if life can be felt ecstatic at the same time as we eat a f****** liver food what if uh and I'm sure if you feel into Christmas and what we can call paradise on earth if you will, right? So maybe it should be taken more literally than just some mythological description in ancient texts. Maybe it's actually possible. Um. And if it's possible to live much more consciously, much more highly vibrating, I'm not so keen on that term, because it's grossly misused, but in the sense that you actually manage to live and feel with, I mean and feelings and be in touch with life in the rewarding now, where you don't run off into the past or back into the future. in your mind all the time, where you actually close. And that's something we all practice. It's not something that's going to happen overnight. It can take a really, really, really, really long time over several generations. But that's what I realise that we've been working on, and the time I have right now is something very special that I haven't experienced in my lifetime. And when I feel into the past life that arises for me as a past life, in my own journey, soul journey, I have not felt this before. I haven't felt this opportunity. I would say this time is incredibly intense. The other lifetimes have also been incredibly intense, but that's because it's been so damn dangerous. I mean, it's all been so survival-based, so you could be pretty sure you were going to die a painful death. Whether you were beaten or slaughtered or hanged or burned or made a scapegoat or you know what the hell I know or died of starvation or died of rotten teeth or whatever. So it hasn't been a party about humans throughout evolution. And you just have to watch documentaries. about how it has been and how it still is in some places on Earth. So that's why it's been completely different, but it's been a completely different kind of intensity. The intensity that is now in the small part of the world that we live in, which is much much less dangerous. It's like because we live in a place where we actually, you know, there's food on the table. Yes, yes, of course life is not easy. Of course it's not, but you know, you don't have to go out and spend all day hoping and finding two berries, right? I mean, there's food on the table, there's stuff like that, but it's actually like it allows for some of that horror that wasn't realised because there was no opportunity for it. There was no knowledge of it. It wasn't possible because humans were really only based in the three lower chakras, the solar plexus, har and root. So it was all extremely alliance-based and survival-based. So it was like there was a loyalty until it wasn't there. That is, this thing about actually living from the heart. In the sense that we live in respect for each other and each other's boundaries and are much more fluid, much more dancing and much more able to clearly say no and it is respected and we also become more of a Dane that is possible in the relational. It hasn't been like that and it's still not like that. So you can still have people who are extremely boundary-crossing. You can still become extremely transgressive as soon as you drop your defence. So, you know, we still tend to tend to be survival-oriented and emphasised in our behaviour. And that's why I talk so much about how it's important we meet children and we take responsibility for that because we have to try and train the nervous system to do something different. So you can kind of say, this is how we've lived for 500,000 years, you know, constantly being kind of in conflict and defence. Now it's like, we're starting to realise that it's possible to do something different and live differently. And it's like, if you really have to give credit to religions, and at least some of the texts there are, you could find the knowledge that the longing, the knowledge that it's possible has been there for the past thousands and thousands of years, but it's just been incredibly difficult to live out, and it still is, but it's as if something collectively happens in the water from the few who tried to practice in secret to avoid the church and everything else. So not to actually become too, to avoid being slaughtered and get out of dominance. The entire Christian religion is very much based on the idea that it was dangerous to stand up with an open heart. A lot of people didn't like that. And it can still be felt today. And that's why you don't have to describe yourself as a Christian. The open heart has nothing to do with Christianity. The open heart has to do with an open heart that has been interpreted in a Christian context, which you can of course use if you think it gives you something, right? So it's as if we're standing right now, and what I would probably call the time now, because it's so intense, is also that things are being shaken up. I see it both in my own life, but also in other people's lives, that if you're stupid, things are being pushed up that are painful. Either crazy things happen in your environment, you know, people get sick and die, or you know, it's as if it's pouring out into the world at large. And then you can say, it hasn't always done that. Well, of course it has, but it's like things have accelerated. It's as if we've had some veils lifted in relation to the fact that we get to see the fruits of the behaviour we've subjected ourselves and each other to for so many years. And it's also as if we're now being told something like, well, you can sit over there and complain, but what are you going to do about it? It's as if we're allowed to see the horrors. We are allowed to see things as they are. And then, of course, we're also forced to do something about it. And it's also as if I experience it as a bit black and white in some ways. Either get with the programme in terms of starting to take care of and release some of these things. Or else you get hit. And it's not that there's no out to get, it's just like the past is catching up with us now collectively. So it seems to be harder to get away. Er, it seems to be harder to get away with being in the dark, so to speak. And being in the dark means being unconscious. Being unaware of what your behaviour is doing to yourself and to others. It's basically defining the darkness. The darkness is there. Unconsciousness is there and there's nothing wrong with that. It's more about you being willing to look at it in yourself. And you're willing to see when you play out in others that they don't take responsibility for it, and then it sets your path so that you can discern between what's mine and yours here? And if it's your darkness, then the loving thing to do is to say it's yours, I'll send it back to you, and if you keep sending it my way, then I have to move away from you. So it's going to be very, it's going to be very visible and so it's also going to seem to be hugely painful because it seems to be bubbling up in everyone in different ways right now. Someone just wrote that there was someone who had signed up at the last minute who wanted to join the group. I'll just jump in here. Erm. Døt. And that's what's so fascinating about this time right now, and that's mostly why. Thud approved. Good, good, good. There you go, there you go. And that's really why I'm talking about this epigenetics of past lives. It's that my experience is that at the same time as things are piling up and it's quite overwhelming and almost everyone's nervous systems are on fire and everyone is in incredible exhaustion. It's like the last two or three years have been one long marathon. And people are just kind of like now they're starting to talk about just kind of spelling away. They don't want to do it anymore. We can't do this anymore. No more war. We can't, we can't do it anymore. And that's just what happened, both in the outer world, but it's also in the inner world that things just seem to tumble up. And from there, it's like, how the hell can we tell the difference between what's bullshit and what's cinnamon, and what should we actually do in terms of relating to everything that's out there in the world and everything that's inside ourselves? So, how do you choose where to put your focus? Because believe me, you can spot suffering in so many places, and you always have been able to. It's just that it's just become such that there's such a veil that's been ripped away. And it's as if we see it more clearly than we might have done. And therefore, at the same time as all that is happening. So if that was all that was happening and there was no help available, then we would be f*****. Well, I would say that we would be really really f*****. Where there is help available there. It also seems as if the healing, redemption potential transformation is also turned up. So it's both as if the darkness has been turned up or that the darkness is just pouring out of the depths. Almost as if it's one of those middleground things that just spills up. But it's also as if the ability to handle it, to transform it, to raise it in vibration to have compassion for yourself and others is also present in each. And it is incredibly important to feel into it. And that's why it's also incredibly important to choose for God's sake choose your suffering with care. So be careful what you expose your mind to. in the sense that and that and I don't want to make such a crazy narrative as is sometimes made in spiritual circles that you must only be high vibrating so you must finally just that is an incredibly simplistic and wrong conclusion if you only want to be high vibrating then you deny the lower chakras if you only want to be high on you then you want to live from the brain up such half a body that ran around down here. That's not going to work. That's the trick right now turned on its head is that the soul wants to incarnate deeper into the darkness. That's where it lies. So if you're running around to chondaline juning chaos ceremonies and you're only going for the ecstasy all the time, now we feel connected, we don't touch what hurts, then you're missing the point. There's all kinds of good things in it. So enjoy the high energies, they are ecstatic and lovely. So it's not that at all. And sometimes you go up there when you think it's all a bit too hard. But what's being called right now is karma release. It's the release of old s*** or epigenetic release that's welling up from the depths, and they f***** with the three lower chakras. That's where they are stagnant. The right vibration, the soul vibration, has a really hard time going beyond the heart because the lower chakra is not cleared up. And it's very, it's very rare that I see the spiritual circles. And it's not that I don't interfere with what you do and don't do and stuff like that. You absolutely have to. And there can be a lot of great things out there of cohesion and like-mindedness and everything else, but I don't see, I very rarely see work being done to bring the darkness home and actually release it so that the soul can be allowed to descend. The soul has a longing to incarnate completely out of your big toe and try, what is it like to be a big toe? Not to learn how to be a big toe, because it's just like no, now I'm a big toe. So it's a uh it wants to live and be in a fully incarnated body. There's nothing in your body that it doesn't want to be, from your deepest anger to your wildest passion to your greatest ecstasy. It is not the soul that has a judgement over darkness and light. It but the one it wants to incarnate, and it can get into a muddle because the vibrations that are here versus heavier vibrations, if you will, but it's not so much that they're heavier because they can still, they can, they can learn to vibrate together, but if there are heavy vibrations that have tied themselves in knots, and that's what happens when I work energetically, that's what I see. There is, there is a split, there is a blockage, so the whole sewer system is completely f*****. There are knots, and that's what trauma does. That's what unresolved stresses over time do. It does an incredible amount. It short-circuits the whole damn thing. And that's really what many people are feeling right now. It's that the whole damn thing is shorting out. And we have more shawl inflow right now because the shawl has a deep longing. It's as if there's an opportunity now to integrate more deeply, but at the same time, it comes down into this in this. It reaches right here to the belly in just like this, it's like it can't really go any further. And that's also why if you feel that you're trying to do just line yoga or mass meditation right now. You try to open up more and you just get more and more energy blocked and get more and more weird symptoms. Take a break from bringing in more energy unless you can get it down. So you need to get it all the way down all the way down to the root and all the way down to the gejas to the motherwort. There should be flow all the way through. Very few people have it all. Almost none, because it's so messy. And you typically either only work in the three lower chakras, not because you've released any flow, but because this is where you operate from, but then you bypass the heart and you get a behaviour that is completely unbearable to be around. You bypass the heart in terms of behaviour, but then you become dull and calculating and just annoying. Incredibly annoying, and you know, you don't understand anything about connecting. And at some point it hurts because people will eventually turn their back on you, because otherwise they'll find out that your behaviour is incredibly annoying. So therefore, if you've been extremely survival-based, um, it makes sense to actually start working on that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Heart opening. And it hurts. It's incredibly painful. Heart opening is sometimes labelled as, you know, oh, it's bliss, it might as well be. But a lot of it hurts like crazy because you're breaking through some armour. You're breaking through something that's been building for a long time. Not necessarily just your own life. You're carrying something too. Erm. And that's also why you have to be careful with something like that, something hardcore. Now I have to meditate twice a day, and now I'm doing you know hardcore caline yoga and stuff like that, where you just try to push through openings. That could be it, it's risky s***. It's like a kundalini erection that happens without the system being able to handle it, it can get you straight into a psychiatric ward. Um, because all of a sudden you have heart opening, how beautiful it sounds, it's beautiful. But heart opening makes you see things as they are. So that is to say, yes, when you see loving actions and you feel love, there's a lot more of it. It fills a lot more. So that means you feel much more. You feel much more life. You feel much more deep notes and love. And you actually feel the difference between care, unconditional love. You learn to differentiate what this is. But when you feel a lot and see more, you also see suffering more. And then you also really feel when someone meets you from a non-open heart. And that's what the majority of people do, because right now there's still not a majority who work with heart opening. So then you see me and the behaviour you encounter in others is still alliance drilling. This is the care I give you care, I expect you to give me care. I invite you to a birthday party where you come and celebrate me and then I expect you to do the same with me whether you like that form of celebration or not. Because that's how we exchange. And that's not to make it a judgement. It's just a different way of operating. There's not a lot of freedom. There's a lot of social control. That's the side effect of this kind of we share care equally. I give I scratch your back. You scratch mine. It has nothing to do with love. It has nothing to do with love. Love is also why when you're in contact with soul the way you can know uh if you start to and so have contact to guides or to other consciousness forms you so you feel and or soul consciousness that helps and that guides you because there's also astral worlds there's also a lot of s*** out there. Um and that way you don't have to worry about that but the way you can work with it is to know if you get input if you get advice for something in the inner planes in the inner worlds and get guidance from if it's like you just have a grain of feeling criticised or made a bad person or you feel a little bit of guilt or you feel pressured to do something then it's not soul contact it's much higher vibrational because soul contact the soul is capable of unconditional love. Unconditional love will be able to have a judgement and say well it would probably be lucky if you did such and such but there will never be love for you but you are you have free will and free will always overrides so that means my love for you will not disappear even if you do something different than I recommend or the advice I give you if you ask your soul for advice. So it's very much a rule of thumb if you're channelling energies and also if you read if you're on sites or spiritual groups where you relate to other people's channelings. Always remember the channelling is only as pure as the medium as the body that is channelling. And that's also why when you channel it's the person channelling because we are all channels, but there are some who professionally go out like and and and and and offer their channelings. And if you follow someone like that, feel the energy. Is there something pressing here? And there may well be a completely new, sober judgement in a channelling. It's a bit like, well, there's this management, there's this, and there's this. But it still comes when it's unconditionally loving, so it still feels different. It has a completely different timbre. So be very aware of that, because as I said, those who channel, well again if they don't have a handle on the three lower chakras, you may be able to get a lot of wisdom down, but you're still interpreting them down a defence network that's tied up in knots. So for me personally, I'm very much aware of how my own information relates to where I am right now. So that means that I don't go out and channel if I'm totally mad in relation to downloading anything, because then it comes through such greasy running goggles. But also in relation to where I seek information for others. How much control do they have over their power? And how good a handle do they actually have on the lower chakras? And often in the spiritual environment, the lower chakras are not under control, but they are under control. And it's not that I have a judgement on them. It's just that I don't, I never go in and look at any system without being invited. That's another thing. When you start having energy vision, it's incredibly important to have high ethics, that you never go into other people's energy unless you've actually been authorised to do so. Um, so I would never do that. But what I do do is that I feel into the energy of what is being channelled. And then I feel into like okay, what's here? How pure is it in relation to how it can be used as a tool? And you can do that in everything. It's newsflow. I use it myself. I can also see that if I haven't been particularly clean, and then I write about it, then I'm also off. So, you know, it's just a known fact of being human. We can very quickly become off. Erm. And then I look a lot at people's ethics. Do they have in relation to If you go out and have, like, there's a sense of like this is the truth or this is like this and I've got that down. I have a direct channel to God Island and I'm 100% always online and it always comes down in the purest form, so I've closed something to the side. Because no one can do that, no one can be 100% pure. It's simply not possible. We can be as pure as it is, but you'll still have it filtered down through whatever we have with us. That's why you can come up with something very clean. It's all about taking care of your psychology. You take care of your energy. And you take care of your family history. You take care of your relationships. So there's a lot of responsibility in this. And sometimes you just want to take some drugs and smoke some cigarettes and drink some wine and avoid that responsibility. That's something completely different. Because you realise that it's like f*** this is going to keep happening. I keep being a layer I can work with. So it's a wild time. I find it's a wild time. I find that people are overwhelmed, exhausted and struggling with forms of pain. The ones that knock them backwards and that they feel powerless to try to get help to deal with, because when you do, it's great that it's no longer taboo to go to a psychologist. It's bloody good. That just becomes the problem. If you go to a cognitive psychologist or a psychotherapist, where they say we need to get out, we need to, we need to, we need to get fat in your childhood. There can be a lot of good stuff in childhood. That aspect is still there. We are still characterised by our childhood. We are still characterised by patterns of inclination. All that stuff that I've been blabbing about for the last 10 years. For sure, but it's just not the only place. And it is, and sometimes it tries to be a bit far-fetched. No, but then it must be because your dad didn't really see you or something. And it just... Yeah. Well, you know, sometimes you can feel like you're babbling about something and your mind is trying to find some stories and stop these overwhelming conditions that hit us like waves right now of meaninglessness, anxiety, fear. It's pouring up. Um. And it's something about sometimes just learning to ride these waves and land them before you make a decision. Is this the time to leave the man? Is it time to sell the house? Is it time to change jobs? It may well be that you should do all three things. Right now it's also happening. I mean, you also realise like f*** that chapter is s***. I have to move on. Sometimes it's just right. It's just when you're in the middle of being caught in a wave of deep meaninglessness or profoundness or whatever it is. So it's just a matter of landing it. First I have to keep an eye on the time because I had actually agreed with myself that I wouldn't sit and babble as much today as I usually do. Instead, I'll do some exercises on how the hell you can work with this. Uh, dive dive dive dive d. Of course, I just need to make sure that I've actually talked about everything that I've already said I would. Um, so where do I start? Yes, so in relation to when these waves hit you, and I think you can feel it, or you are completely with me when I say this. You've probably experienced it your whole life. Um, because I don't think the things I've written would have made you sit here today if it didn't make sense in some way. So as much as the soul really wants to be conscious and present in a nervous system, in an emotional body, in every single now and experience everything that's going on here on earth. Just as much, um, all these layers want somewhere to come up and be released. And you can kind of see it as You shouldn't really, maybe we should turn it around and say, you shouldn't really work so much on the ecstasy and get and get and get more, that is, become more and more highly vibrating. You should probably see it more like this, but your soul energy is actually highly vibrating. It's more about getting it to form the same resonance with your body consciousness. And your body consciousness can easily dance with the soul energy. It's just where it's tied up in knots. That's what we need to get. Unravelled. So it's actually, you need to see it rather than seek and become more love and become more, because you are love. I mean, you already fucking are. It's more about looking at the distractions that get in the way and taking care of them. Because then there's no project. You're not broken, you're not incapable of love, and there's nothing to it. But there may well be a lot of, you know, balls that have gone a bit, and then there's a dam that needs to be broken down. And there's a knot in the pipeline there. So it's actually more the things that need to be worked on. And just as much about being present in everyday life, you can use everyday life to actually work on redemption. I would actually say especially, I think there's only one man here today, but otherwise it's women. Especially when you have a feminine system, because a feminine system is more in motion. So I have a hypothesis, and it will also be a lecture in itself. I don't know if I'm right, but I have a hypothesis that all women and men are very, very naturally feminine. The feminine is not just a woman. The feminine is an aspect or resource, you could say, in being human. Actually, naturally, you have greater access to self-healing, because the essence of healing is actually that you get what is stagnant to move, because emotional energy is really just looking for movement. And that you then at the same time use your consciousness, whether you call it soul consciousness, your ego. or your knowing or whatever you call it to witness what's happening in you? It's actually the two elements. The movement where the feelings change at the same time as you witness what's happening in you. That's actually where healing happens. That's also why a lot of people in this situation have been in counselling because I can't use talk therapy anymore. It was really good in terms of learning and feeling emotions and stuff, but it's just not sure you can use it for much more. It doesn't mean that the conversation is gone. It's more like they need to be connected to something else. They need to be connected to something where we actually work. Both with body consciousness and soul consciousness or perhaps we can also call it unconditional love consciousness. It might be easier. What it is you find out the concepts you put on yourself. What makes sense to you. So in order for the two to be allowed to meet in everyday life, it can sound extremely difficult. And if you have to do all sorts of strange exercises for it. So I would recommend that you just follow your darkness, because here we come back to one of the things that is the most difficult or one of the things that is most troublesome right now is the three lower chakras. That's where there's the most rot. It's really where there's the most advice for most of us or probably for you who are here today, because again, you will have had heart openings. There will be some longing that will have spoken to you. Because otherwise, again, this lecture would not have been interesting to you at all. So typically, that's where we collectively have the biggest problems. It's the three joints chakra. And here it's actually about you simply having to own your darkness. Instead of constantly going for, for God's sake, we shouldn't have anything to do with the lower vibrating emotions, we should just constantly climb up by being high vibrating. And then we ignore everything. That, no, I'm not happy at all. I'm completely happy now. Now I'm trying to make myself crazy. Now I'm trying to raise it all the time. So instead, when you feel something that's difficult, you should actually re-invite it. Not invite it in to linger. You have to invite it in to witness it. There is a very crucial difference here when you experience a situation in your everyday life that hurts. There may be parties with your children, with colleagues. So there are a billion, there are a billion people or a billion opportunities to experience something dark. Something dark, something that is difficult in everyday life. And it's actually when you have the opportunity to take a break, turn your gaze inwards and feel like this: ‘Oh, okay, that hurt.’ Because what we've learnt in our culture is to walk away from what hurts. That is, we numb it, we walk away from it, or we break it up in some way. And we can actually do that, that's what happens in a narcissistic defence. It's that every time you have something inside you, you blame it on the people around you, and then you keep going at the other person until they say, well, okay, it was my fault. And then you get temporary relief because it's like, well, you've taken the blame, so you don't have to carry it. Until the next time you have a hard time, and then you do the same. Um, so it's a very immature, extremely immature way of regulating, which becomes like a broken record that doesn't work very well because you lose your relationship if you become unbearable and become close. So it's actually about starting to take responsibility, because it may well be that someone has crossed the line where you need to speak up. It may well be, but still, the effect, the feeling they've made in you, is actually your responsibility to take care of, as well as the responsibility to go back and say no you won't find me another time and if they keep it up that's just the way it is so we have to use relationship so I have to move away from you if you keep having this behaviour so there's a big emotional responsibility in that and what you can do in such a situation when you sit when you feel something in a situation it can be something that arouses sadness or pain or whatever something that is difficult it's actually that you start practising every time you have something that is difficult and you have this it often settles like a ball of anxiety in your stomach that you try to avoid that is, you throw yourself into work Or you drink a cup of coffee or a glass of wine or smoke a cigarette or call a friend and talk about something else or something else. There are all kinds of ways to try and avoid what hurts. That's really the only thing we've learnt. We've learnt to compress pain. And then we've learnt to ignore it and avoid it or become victims of it. To be completely consumed by it. So that we can only be like, oh, we're going to be so you'll be pulled down. So one of the reasons you want to get away is because you're afraid of being pulled down and locked into that place where the condition almost becomes chronic. And there is a risk of that. So it's understandable that you try to get away in all sorts of ways. So some of this work in your everyday life you can handle yourself. Some of your darkness you can't handle yourself. There will be some things that hurt you so much, you get pulled down. There will be some ways when you label someone. There will be some situations that trigger something in you that hurts so much that when you direct your consciousness towards it, you can't heal it yourself. You can relieve it yourself. And the way you can recognise the difference is that when you relieve it, when you can, let's say you experience a situation that triggers some pain, it triggers some discomfort and you don't know what it is. That is, you go in, you just remove the situation, and then you go in, and then you breathe. Everything you've learnt in yoga, meditation and so on, if you have something like that with you in relation to keeping your system open, you use it here because your system, your nervous system has learned to lock around something that is painful, and here you actually have to open up. So you actually go in and then you actually look at your body with a soft gaze and say like this: ‘Okay, this is uncomfortable. What's happening here?’ And then you feel the condition and you feel where in your body it is. Feeling it in your body, where it's located, means that you avoid getting a lot in your head and for your mind to make history, and then you go down into your body. And what happens here is that when you follow it, that is, you become more and more practised in following conditions to the end. That is, when you feel the discomfort, you first feel the instinct, the impulse to move away from it. Because what you've learnt is what your mother and father learnt. It's what your grandma, grandpa learnt. Your grandma, grandpa, your beer. Everyone in retrospect has learnt to try to run away from it or spit it out on others. So that means right now, you're practising your nervous system. You're training it and saying, I'm going to do something else. It's difficult, but the more you do it, the more your children will be able to, you know, we've kind of driven the wheels, the wheels have driven this way. So now we're going to drive this way. So you just have to get them to turn the other way. It's a bit tiring then. So there's a lot of work and a lot of responsibility involved. That's also why nothing about this is easy, and it doesn't happen overnight. But when you focus on it, you feel that discomfort, what the hell is that? And then all of a sudden you realise that's what it is. So when you dare to be with it and breathe, say, you go against the impulse to do this, then you can you can also be yoga exercises. While or just open up like that. Breathe, use breathing. That is, you go back, but you keep going. You don't let go of the darkness. And it's not because the darkness wants to let go, it's because you've been given permission to avoid the darkness. So the darkness has no problem with being dark. It's us who have a problem. You know it's something else. So you try to be with it and then you get it so that when you can be with it, it starts to change. That is to say, that feeling of weird discomfort. It might just settle like this, ah, I can feel a pain in my stomach, or it might feel like a blockage or a tightness that sometimes feels like a layer of armour. So it's a heaviness. Then you try to be more like, what the hell is that? And you try to breathe through it. Just a little bit, then you might find out like: ‘God, I'm furious, you know, I'm fucking furious.’ And then you might be allowed to be like: ‘Okay, pull that rage into the cells, f***, I'm furious. You can't, you're not acting on it. You have an impulse to straighten it out.’ It was also because someone said something, and it's also because I feel trapped. There's all kinds of mind tests going on. It's learnt that when you're nice, you have to, you have to put blame on someone. So you go through that. It's kind of a hellish fire, isn't it? And you're kind of like, okay, yeah, but it may well be someone's fault, but right now I'm just with the race. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. S I know you would try to put it somewhere, but right now I'm just trying to be oh this overwhelming rage. And if you're with it long enough, it will typically change again. That's it, that's what emotions do. The fact that you're breathing, that you're not afraid. This is really what it's all about when you turn round and see the fear rising in your face. It's actually about daring to be with the sensations that are inside you and you dare to invite it in, not to be consumed and 100% identified. is added, but actually because you soberly witness it, so you have your witness, which is actually also the soul. When it's just the ego witnessing, then you become identified with it. When it's the soul higher consciousness witnessing it, it's more like when you, as a parent, you witness that your child is having a hard time, and you just do it in compassion. It's okay, I have to help you, but you can handle it. Well, it's actually the same one you practice for yourself. It's the same very loving unconditional love parent has. It's actually the feeling that it has. And what happens here, is that when it then starts to transform, um, they change and often during the anger there will be an often and sometimes you may feel an overwhelming sadness, you may need to cry and you may have such it may sometimes be so overwhelming that you almost you can't breathe, you're with it, you're with it, and that here it can be as it is right now where there's something in the water, so I actually want to say that I'm not joking when I talk about past lives and epigenetic memories and things like that or archetypal images that emerge. My experience is that it comes up from the depths for people. So more than that, when you do this, there are flashes of images. You see yourself, you get a sense of you've got a spear, you get to be with it. The mind wants to reject anything that's strange or try to cover it up. But just the ones that come, allow it again, get back to such neutral place you can and allow it to be there. And also allow it to go away again as quickly as it came. That's typically the way I experience past lives, memories or or epigenetic residues they arise. It's like one of those, it's like a break. pieces. It's not like that, it's not like a doubt, that's not how I experience it. It's like such fragments and such a straight picture, and then there's a sensation, and then if I dare to be with it, then it can expand more. And that's the point where I'm with it, shedding light on it, consciousness on it, but I also have to keep my mind from starting to put a story over it or thinking, well, it was probably because I saw a series yesterday where someone got a spear in the stomach and stuff like that. So it's really about holding that place where you don't attach anything to it, but you just acknowledge it. And it's an exercise. So sometimes you're a bit like that, then you'll have doubts, and it doesn't matter. It's always an angle you can practice more and more and more. Just be aware that some things may well arise here, and when they do, just allow them to be there. So the thing about if it feels, it can feel like you're suddenly standing when you feel a sensation that you feel like you have a spear in your stomach. I've experienced that many times. It's not very nice, but when you're with it and you dare to breathe through it, it can release itself. And here we come to the difference between what you could release yourself and where it's quite important that you get help. Because some things, when you can feel it dying, then like you say, you'll start by having something that's uncomfortable. Some situation has triggered something in you that is deeply uncomfortable, that goes beyond the situation. You feel like it was a small situation and like okay, I had a little argument with my husband, so why do I feel like I want to kill him or that I feel like I'm sure he doesn't love me. You can sense that there is no connection between what happened and what state I'm in. That's one of the best ways to know there's something else going on. There's something that runs deeper. Sometimes it's deeper because it was something related to your childhood. It's true. That would be the most common psychological explanation for it. My point is that right now there's something in the water that when you feel it a lot, okay, it was a small episode, but shut up, man, it triggered this in me. So like let's say you have to go out with a new attitude in the world and you're terrified of being killed. You can be pretty sure there's past lives involved or epigenetic residue because it doesn't make sense. You're not going to be killed. Many can see it as a symbol of not being seen and met. Of course there is some of that, but if your body is terrified, you can, if you go down and talk to your body consciousness so that your dear body puts its hand on your body, what do you need right now? And you can feel it almost shaking. So you almost have a shock reaction. And this is where the mind can sometimes go in and say that this is actually where such cognitive therapy is completely dangerous because it's like that but it's not really a body you're not being killed but if the body is still terrified, it may be because there is trauma in the system from previous lives or from your family line where going out and standing up for yourself and an attitude that was opposed to that to the crowd that killed you it has been it has it is how it has been So there is something here, where we can override this body. And boy, is the body tired of not being taken seriously. That's actually the body's main message. And this is where the body is quite like that to the soul. Now the bullshit stops. You have to teach me to understand that it's me who tastes, who carries the pain here. The soul can have a great desire to go out and try all sorts of exciting things in life, but the body is just like, oh no, should I be thrown out of that too? Aware of how dangerous it can be, because the soul knows nothing about it. The soul doesn't know about pain in that way. The soul doesn't have a nervous system. It wants to get down and find out what it's like to be in a nervous system? But because the soul in our culture, where we are right now historically, hasn't incarnated down into the lower chakras very much yet, it doesn't have an understanding of what the body is actually being exposed to. So the soul can have, you know, a great longing to explore some darkness, where the body just gets traumatised over and over again, it's just that, you know, it's me that gets f****** traumatised every time. And that and the soul doesn't do it out of malice, but it's again that place where they where there's some miscommunication. So there's something about really having enormous sensitivity to the body's responses and taking the body when you're working in everyday life and with this and taking your body extremely seriously. If it's terrified of something that your mind can't find an explanation for, there will be an explanation. All my weird phobias and all my anxieties and stuff like that, that's what I've managed to chew my way through so far. There have been logical explanations for it all, but it has been tied to something that has turned out to be either past lives or epigenetic residues, whatever we want to call it. Hold on a second. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So it's more like this again, this is what I want to say with a lot of people coming to me to say how do I avoid how do I create a world where I'm not obligated to my children where I don't conflict with my partner where I don't conflict from a distance and of course there's something about learning to communicate and learning how to talk in ways where you don't constantly end up in conflict because it's enormously exhausting and it also makes us pull ourselves down into the lower chakras and we're a little too closed to the heart, so none of us really want it the other way round - it's actually all that sometimes when we feel something that hurts, see it as an invitation to release it. Invitation to resolve it and bring it up and bring it up and transform it and or clean up your relationship. Because sometimes when you've followed enough things in your system in a relationship with a person, you realise like this: ‘God, I'm taking so much responsibility. You take no responsibility for your behaviour and you don't seem to be maturing. You don't seem to, when I bring this to you and say, no, that's where it takes you off. I know, because I've taken care of mine, and now I can see clearly that you're actually being rude, you're actually being rude, you're actually doing something unpleasant and the person doesn't change their behaviour, then you have to move your ass, otherwise the person will destroy you. And that person doesn't have to be evil or anything, but again, that's where the calling is right now. Do you want to go to your heart and try to operate on your heart and deal with your darkness, or do you choose to keep going deeper into your defence mechanisms and keep saying it's everyone else's fault because it's much easier. There is a bigger breaking point in that right now. So you will also experience that people around you are doing crazy s*** and smoking behaviours. You're like where the hell did you end up there? People are under pressure right now because it's like we're in a time right now where there's a choice. What do you want to do here? Do you want to start bringing home some responsibility or do you want to lose yourself more and more? And if you have people in your life you care about who are getting more and more lost, you have to respect their soul journey. You can't help another person into the light. That's not your job. That's not your job. The one about whether I have enough love for two. That's the biggest misunderstanding ever. You can have love. You can have a lot of compassion. You can easily have soul love for another person, where you as a body consciousness say, I simply can't be with you because that behaviour is too transgressive. I can see that you are struggling and I have tried to help, but you are not receptive to my help. And if you've come to that conclusion, then you need to move. Well, that's my best recommendation. I will, of course, and this is the part where you can help a person who reaches out. If a person is on their knees and reaches out and gets a handshake, gets up on their feet and now I can stand on my own. Finally, for God's sake, help as much as you possibly can, but if people use it as a crutch, you have to be willing to say I'm removing the crutch because I'm preventing your maturity by continuing to act as a crutch for you. And the human will be furious with you and try to blame you for their misery. This is where you need to learn the difference between empathy and compassion. Because empathy, you will feel the person, you will sympathise with the person's feelings and say, well, that's too bad for you too. You go in with compassion. When it's compassion, then you understand their bigger journey. I can see, I can see you're in pain, but you'll be able to see further. You can see the energy pathway. That is, if I go in now and help you with your pain, but you don't recognise when I've gone, you'll collapse again. Then you go back and spend too much money. Or you go back and do something that creates a new mess in your life that pushes you over the edge again, where I have to help you clean it up. If you can see that it's a recurring pattern, then you giving them help doesn't help them. It just gives them a momentary relief. It's just an addiction. It's really just an addiction. And that's the most loving thing you can do is actually say, I wish you all the best, but I'm removing my help right now. And you will typically be able to feel it because you've given and given and given and given and you're really tired, and such a giving dynamic has arisen. And it's also incredibly important that you become aware of this time. Is there anyone you're taking advantage of like this? Are there places where you're immature, you don't want to look at? Where are you using others as a like a like a like a cripple? It's incredibly important because we're going to abuse each other. We're going to try to suck each other of energy because we're overwhelmed, we're exhausted. Um, this is the time to set ourselves and each other free. To actually make love. And that also means that a lot of these alliances start to fall away, and that makes friends you thought you had start to, well, you can just stand and feel and whatever, I don't know, I don't know where I stand in terms of relationships. It's as if it's being redefined what it even means to interact with each other. Um, so it's a confusing time, and it's a very beautiful time. Um, but also overwhelming. Overwhelming time. So you could say that you can do a lot in your daily life. So I would actually say practice your system. It's my best one. And this is what I say to everyone, so this is also because I can also talk about this without even talking about something soul and something because it's basically about the regulation cycle that you go in and follow the feeling that is there and you dare to follow it to the end. And then you not only feel it to the end, you also feel release in your body. You actually physically feel that I was in hell. I didn't know why. Then I realised it was this and then it was that, and then it was this and that. Now I can feel and you feel so free and you feel like you've landed. You're in a state where it's landed. When that happens, you know you've actually made a little release yourself. And the more you practice it, the less you need to go out and see a healer and psychologist and everything else. Because that's actually a huge amount of work you can do yourself to get through many of these everyday things that come up. That being said, you will have some themes. You're going to have some themes that hurt so f*****g bad that when you try to do this, it doesn't help. No matter what you how you try to get it to the end, you're just like Just feel, if I approach that lump there, if I approach that state there, if I approach those triggers there, I get absorbed. It's as if you can feel that you have a real reluctance to even approach the darkness in yourself. And it's typically a defence, because it's like if you approach that, you'll drown, because that's why it's really good to listen to instead of condemning the defence, because the defence is actually there to protect you. And when you have themes like that, I would definitely recommend that you find a very skilled energy worker. Um, to help with enlightenment. Because that's what I can see when I work with people there. You don't have to do it yourself. And I've also been able to see that in myself. I've also been able to take care of a lot of my own running. But in recent years, since there's something in the water where we've been able to dig deeper, I've been able to dig into some s*** I've never been able to get my hands on. And the way I see it, I simply don't believe I could have got hold of it myself. Because part of the work had to do with those very deep, deep themes that have been created again and again and again and again and again and again that have been in the family lines and so on. There's a level of surrendering to being completely flooded by that state, but you can only do that if you know there's someone pulling you out. Because you can pull yourself out when you're completely flooded with total powerlessness, total shutdown, total fear, then you can't there's not, there's not there, it also means that consciousness withdraws. So, you are that whole state. So there has to be someone who can pull you out. And I've only experienced up until now, where I'm standing now, I've only experienced that energy work can help. I haven't experienced that conversation can help in any way whatsoever. Yes, combined afterwards. But when you're caught up in it, I've only experienced that it has been actual work on the energy system. Erm, in relation to yes. And someone talks about an energy worker, and energy worker can be many things. And I should also have updated my repertoire of words on this, because I don't really think energy work is a very good word. Um, when I mean energy work, I mean those who have energy vision. That is to say, around our body, we have a field. We have an energy field, erm, er, electromagnetic field. And you want to. And you could say that those who have energy vision have tried to depict it in different ways. It's also there with the chakras with we have chakra uh down, which are also such energy points and so that kind of bind things together about this field we have around us, which is kind of in different vibrations and different colours. If you have energy vision, and these are actually my beliefs, everyone can work with and develop it. Some people have it with them and see energy, and some get it, and some can work with it. And that actually means that you can see energy traps and you can also see the blockages in the energy field. are in the energy field. This means that when you have experienced something traumatic in your existing life or in your family lineage, it will create some energy clutter. There may be splits, there may be knots, there may be blockages, there may be there may be there may be there may be there may be I have a spit out, and I have energetically, it has something that has looked like spear fragments and bullets and all s***. I've got crystals and all sorts of strange shit I've pulled out of it. And I have to say my surrender to that work, to developing my energy vision further has actually been that and that and allowing what I look like. Not so much for 12 in downtime, but I've fucking hoisted a lot of weird s*** out of people's people systems. So that's kind of it. And one of the things I would recommend, where I think one of the best things I've seen in terms of trying to describe the energy work in the different layers and stuff like that. It's the one called Barbara. Barbara Brenon I've done. I have one of her books. I can try to find it again. She's written three books. There's Light Emerging and Hands of Light. And then there's a third one, which I can't remember what it's called. And she has some really nice pictures. She has some really cool ones, for example, she shows something here. She shows a little bit how she sees it with energy vision, and so many people see it with energy vision. And I think it's one of the most detailed and descriptive. That doesn't mean that she's right about everything. It's not like that at all, but it's that thing about how the hell do we describe something that is invisible to the naked eye? So it's the inner eye that we see with. And that's what I call energy work. It's actually when I and others work in people's energy. So when I work, I have my eyes closed and then I actually go in and look at where the hell is there a blockage? And often I actually ask people to do some of the things I specialise in and I now understand why. It's because I've been so interested in understanding epigenetics. So I've been so these deep deep deep deep deep deep stresses that have settled as such deep blocks because they are the hardest. They're bloody hard. Um, they're hard as hell to dance with. And they're typically the ones you can't release yourself. Well, I mean, because there's no point in releasing them yourself. They are simply too deep. And I would say that going in and seeing them and the way I usually work with them, where they're like, okay, I typically have people who have worked with themselves for a while and are well versed in their patterns and have also identified, okay, these are the situations where I kneel my head against the wall. And then there's an overwhelming feeling of this. And no matter how much I've worked with it in too many different ways with therapy, with psychopharmaceuticals, with you know drumming journeys with you know what they've been all around and say it's going to f****** continue. So there may well be a feeling that you've peeled off some layers, like as soon as life shows itself in a certain way, it's there again. And that's the kind of thing that I think is kind of funny because it's the wrong word. Of course it's not, but that's what we girls are curious about. How the hell do we get hold of this, because talk therapy can't reach it. Peter Levin, working with the nervous system can do something. Body, well, working with the body can definitely do something. Yoga and movement in relation to loosening up can definitely do something. But it's as if you can only get so far with everything. And whether you use, you know, Iwaska or MDMA or whatever you do to kind of be in, to help the body to be better, that also does something. But it's still the case that sometimes there are things that need to be physically reshaped, taken out, cleaned out, broken down, transformed in the energy system, because it's simply as if there are some cemented layers that need help. And that's what I see when I work. If someone comes and says, okay, that's the one that comes to me, I actually ask the person to go in and recall the feeling that arises in those situations. And if the person is not aware of their patterns, I will typically be able to go in and see it in the energy system. When I start working with that, the person typically starts to feel that something is happening. Well, it feels, not everyone feels it. I would actually say that the more energy work you do, you actually start to feel it. That is to say, when I'm inside and picking at the energy, it feels a bit like I'm picking at people. It's not always pleasant, but the good thing is that when you feel the discomfort, you actually feel something you're releasing. You feel things contract and become uncomfortable and suddenly you can breathe again. Because it also allows you to have an awareness of the process. So someone is doing some kind of healing, it doesn't matter if you feel anything or not and stuff. And it's also true, I work as someone who can't feel anything. So you know, and it also depends a little bit on where you are in the journey and stuff like that, but I would say over time people experience a greater sensitivity. And I actually feel when I say, hey, now it's gone. Yes, it did. Or the moment I can see that I've finished releasing something, and then the person says like this: ‘Well, no, it did. It really stung my heart, so now it's gone.’ And just like that, it's clear, because you know the entrenchment is now gone, right? So there's something here that's ancient. So the work and the shaman and mystics and stuff like that have worked with forever and ever, it's just been more of a kind of hidden tradition. Uh, which to me is just as necessary and just as evidence-based as all sorts of other forms. You have to approach it in a different way. And so it can be a little bit and because it's so hard to see, it's about finding the ones that have it best described. And again, I think Barb Branden's books are wonderful in terms of describing some of these things, what the energy view can look like. I see it a little bit differently. I see a lot I'm very diagnostic, so I go in a lot. I actually ask to see where the mess is, and then I tidy it up, and then there's light clutter. Because the system is never static. So it's not as if you've landed something and then nothing happens again. And sometimes there are also many more layers, so sometimes I've worked to reach a certain plateau, and then it turns out that there are more layers to it. And typically the things you have with you, there can be more layers, but then it's a new note, you can notice the difference in it. So it's also very fascinating work. It's also, uh, it's also intense. And I think I also wrote that on one of the posts, that at some point you can have an ignonist bliss. You can say like f***, can't I go back before I started all this? So it can be quite overwhelming, and it can be very painful, not just painful in confusion, but actually it can also cause pain. In other words, it can cause strange pains in the body that the doctor can't do anything about because they are not visible to the naked eye. But energy pain, it's a thing. It's not just psychosomatic. I think a lot of psycho, what we call psychosomatic, I actually think, if you look at it with energy vision, it will actually be, well, but I understand that. I mean, you've got a huge fucking sword sitting right there. Why don't we just pull it out, right? You know, or a blockage, or you know that there's a huge amount of fear in the nervous system. Why don't we just clean it out and stuff, right? So that's what makes a lot of sense to work with this, which is also why I talk about it, because sometimes it's a difficult topic to talk about, because it's also for many people it's a bit of a ding dong like past lives and stuff, right? But it just kind of presents itself. Um, and I experience more and more when people come and have such suffering, I've been 10 years in counselling, and I've also kind of picked my childhood, and yes there are things, but it's just like I get there, it's like I have a calling to go deeper. I simply don't know what to do. I mean, should I do body therapy. It's like people are like there's something here I need to get hold of, but I don't know what to do. And that's where I say I'm a skilled energy worker or healer or whatever the hell we call them people who have people who have energy vision and know how to work with the energy system that it's a huge gift where we are right now because there's so much trauma shit coming up that's pretty stuck it's pretty sticky some of it and some of it you can't fucking act you can't fucking talk out of it that good. I think I'll do some exercises, because then I might be able to get some questions at the end. Let's see, is there anything else I promised to say that I haven't said? No, there isn't. So it's really more like, I would really recommend you, invite you to use your everyday life to get to know your darkness. And getting to know your darkness, it's actually everything that normally needs to be slave vibrating just like that not right now I feel, I'm pissed off, or I'm pissed sad, or I'm pissed frustrated, or I feel weird. So really use, take it seriously and have your loving soul witness on So like okay, I'll invite it in as you will witness you when your child is having a hard time. Um, and see what you can land yourself. Feel, really notice the change. This one like, no, I feel great. Now I feel nice again. Ha. Because that's when you also start to get that feeling of empowerment. God, there's a lot of not taking care of myself. Well, I also think that being a psychologist and doing something like what I do would be a dying art. At some point, there's a lot more self-assertion before we might have to adjust the energy field a bit from time to time. I think, along the way, we are also enormously ourselves. Helen. So there's a lot you can heal yourself or bring to fulfilment yourself. And then the themes where you bang your head into a wall again and again and again, don't do it yourself. It's too overwhelming because if you go down into that darkness and get overwhelmed, there's no one to pull you up. Erm. So when you feel you have a huge defence against going down into the darkness, but at the same time you need to get it looked at, then it's like seek out someone like me who can do this or others who can do this. That would be my best bet right now in terms of working with those blocks. Um, there are probably other ways. Erm, it's just the one that I've seen right now that's most effective. Um, and that's probably also why I've dabbled so much in all kinds of healing modalities, because I'm like, well, what the hell are we doing here, we're really banging our heads into something that is difficult and that hurts again and again and again and again and again, because that's also what binds us. It's this thing where you just say, well, souls are always evolving and stuff like that. But in my experience, there are a lot of souls who are lost, that is, who are messing around. In the same mud, because it can be really really hard to escape these defences. And that's also why I see right now that much of what's going on on earth right now is a huge amount of trauma healing work because that's actually what's blocking. It's what prevents the soul from incarnating. It's actually what makes it harder to be water. Whether you use soul terminology or you just say this thing about feeling alive in the body. It's every time there's something that triggers a trauma, it all knits together. So as I see it, it's the darkness we have to deal with right now not because we have to be consumed by it or disappear in it, but because we really and not because it can't be there, but because the darkness has to be in motion, and when there is trauma, that motion has stopped. There is simply a stagnation that is becoming more and more cemented, and it hurts like hell in the system. And it actually makes it hard to live, because there's always been something trying to trick you into trying. I hope it helped a little bit, maybe it has released something in you. That would be nice. And if not, at least it might have given you an opportunity to practice a little bit with what I've been talking about, that you can actually work with in your daily consciousness, work with in your everyday life, where you can work with just saying when you are overwhelmed by something into an emotional state, then you can actually go in and work with it and solve it on the spot. Not always, but you will have some success experiences. You will simply, you will start to have some things where you feel, ‘I feel awful’. You open up, you're with it, you bring light to it, and you might spontaneously want to move your body. Now I'm sitting and working energy, but you may also feel like using your body or doing something where you feel like okay, I need to move this energy. And together, while it's moving, you can feel it changing, maybe from rage to sadness, to whatever. And that you suddenly feel like, hey okay, now I feel my way to you and now I actually feel better. And now, and typically when you make such a release, the icing on the cake is that you feel as if you feel more powerful. It's like blockages and stagnated energy, they lock down our power. That is, when we release something, we actually feel renewed. You feel new vatality. It was as if you and As energy, I see it as more power coming in. But how it feels, it's not so important how I see. It's more how it feels. And it feels more like you have more passionate and have more power or see things more clearly and know more specifically how to deal with the situation in question should it happen again. So in that way it's very life-giving. We have 10, 10 minutes left. Um and I could go on with some of those exercises, but I think I'd rather take some questions because I've opened up for questions, and I think there are already a few in there, so those of you who are left, you can really just use the opportunity to ask some questions, and then I'll take a look and see if there's anything in here, because then I can just uh then I can just answer it just have such a fat index finger that comes here. Oh, that's fine. Thank you, thank you. And there was one here. Ah, when you say that, you make me think that it would be good to have a lecture on how a woman and a man can go together as a couple when the woman might heal at a faster pace. Ah, it was in relation to my hypothesis that the woman actually has a potential to offer the healing frequency because her system is naturally in more motion. And that he actually and he she, well now it can also be the other way round in the genders. So sometimes it's a man who is much more in contact with the feminine and perhaps and thus the impression of a woman who is more in contact with a lot So when I say he she, knowing that it's not tied to gender, then they will will will many women probably as I experience women, I find that they typically have a great longing to be part of the feminine. That's what they feel most identified with. And the masculine is more learnt. That doesn't mean that they don't have the masculine ability to act, direct and so on and so forth. But that's the difference between being more at home in one or the other. And that's where I see that because you can call it movement. And being with emotions is a feminine quality that men should also have, of course, because it's feminine masculine resources that we can tap into. But I feel that women have something here, at least those who are very well versed in the feminine, the movement has something to offer in terms of redemption. And yes, it's absolutely right that it's a bit exciting how we can actually help each other in relationships too, because I actually believe that there can be a lot of healing in relationships in terms of how we can help each other here. Um, where you can say the masculine can contribute. So where you can say that can heal the feminine, now I'm talking archetypically, so it's the feminine, the pain some of you experienced, at least I experienced it when I worked with it, that enormous pain over the fear of going out and being seen, is because in the feminine there is a completely instinctive archetypal deep longing to be witnessed as she is without judgement. Deep deep deep deep deep longing. And this is actually this masculine ability. The masculine ability is consciousness that observes and sees and encounters. The problem is just in the masculine on the development path that has been, that is, masculine in men, now I'm putting the masculine over on top of over on top of the gender, that there is a huge amount, that is, the gap between the sexes has become so big, the distance and the wounds between the sexes are so big, so the woman often expects not to be seen, and the man is often unable to see her and often comes to unconsciously assess her and judge her in a way he does not understand. Oh, plus then there are all those obvious assaults and acts of violence, right? But now I'm actually just talking in a relationship where there isn't all kinds of violence and abuse and stuff like that. Even there, in a feminist relationship, the feminine will shut down many times a day because the masculine will act hurtfully. But not because he wants to, but because he doesn't see her. He hasn't got it, so there's something about we're standing where we're standing on we're on such an evolutionary journey where we've really come to sleep together as genders. Women and men too. Going both ways. So it's not this, it's not just the man's fault. That's rubbish, that's rubbish. We mustn't end up there. I would say, I would actually say that both genders are, it's not about us being equally hurt. It's not some equality bullshit, but there are so many wounds between us. And the thing about it is that there is a huge degree of chance of retraumatising each other in a relationship. At the same time, there is a huge possibility that we can actually transform the wounds together. And that's hugely exciting, hugely magical and, and hugely overwhelming and hugely everything. So I completely agree with you on that. This is actually something that I think I'm going to write a lot more about and will invite my dear husband to write about because this is what I'm doing with him really because it's something that I can't really do myself, you have to play ball with some man who thinks it's fun, right, and there's a lot to pick up here, there are so many wounds between the sexes. Which are epigenetic, which are archetypal. And I don't think everyone has to go through all the wounds. I think you can create an energy pathway to make it easier. But there are some patterns in it that I think all relationships would have to go through. And having a map with someone who walks the path, I think that can be a huge help. So yeah, I agree. I'm sure there will be more of that. I'll just put my big pointing here to see if there are any more questions. There will be one here. How can it be handled if you have a close relationship that is very immaturely closed, but that you don't want to? To break the relationship with. Answer. If you have a relationship with someone who is very closed and immature and who you for various reasons. There can be many reasons why you don't It could be family, it could be financial, it could be you have children together, there could be all sorts of reasons why it's not straightforward it's not just straightforward so it's never that simple you just have some relationships say if it was a friend, we don't have to be together with. But, but many of the relationships where we're like, what the hell am I doing here? Well, because we're entangled in ways where you can't just walk away. And there's no intention of just walking away. And I would say that it's actually about learning how to act in those relationships. That is, if you're in a relationship with someone who's going to black and often, and the person doesn't take ownership of it and disclaim responsibility, then you'll have to, for example, refrain from, well, there are many things you wouldn't be able to share with such a person. That person will use what you share against you. You have to be extremely aware that the person might take advantage of you. You have to be extremely aware that the person might step on your toes. So you will actually have to learn and deal with that person with very clear boundaries in terms of what you will put up with and what you will not put up with. And you will also have to learn to deal with it in a way, because what typically happens if a child is very or a child or a person is very closed and very immature, is that they typically don't like that much. They typically have a tendency to be transgressive, manipulative, exploitative, but when you and they don't handle it very well, they don't handle it very well, because they don't know how to set limits, but many aren't really, because they don't operate, they are unconsciously unable to see their own behavioural patterns. And if there is no self-reflection and a desire to learn to understand themselves relationally with others, then they are not then they don't have the willingness to stand in that confusion, that pain to actually start taking on the journey. So that is, they just reject they are very black and white they reject consequences. It's something to do with them. And that means that it's not really worth talking to, but if you've concluded that the person is not going to move, they're not going to change, then it's s*** trying to talk to the person about these patterns, because it's a waste of ballars. So it's actually something like, you have to manage your energy. So you have to know, you have to assess what parts of myself do I want to put into play with this person, and what parts do I not want to invite that person into at all, because they will be exploited or mocked or singled out or it can do all sorts of things, or the person will not come and gossip about me when I have gone about some very private emotional things. So you just have to expect that you're going to have to be very square to have a person like that in your life. But that way, it's probably not going to be very nourishing for you, but you can probably make it manageable. You might be able to do it in a way where it's manageable and the person doesn't get so many unconscious punches in. I would actually say that it depends on the nature of the relationship, how close, how much interaction and how much of yourself you've shared, both in terms of body, if it had been a sexual relationship, but also in terms of dreams and thoughts and visions and vulnerabilities. So that's the thing about how much how how how how much has the person been allowed to influence your own self-understanding and self-esteem. Before you discovered that God, this person has some behaviours that are not very healthy. I would also recommend cleaning up your system a bit, because there will have been some shortcuts and some punches, and there will be some gaps in your energy system, where you kind of that's why sometimes, if someone has been with someone who has narcissistic traits or has been, you know, you sometimes end up in a relationship with people who have the same annoying behaviour. Some of it is actually because some people are going to break down our sense of self. It breaks us down. And it damages our energy system. And it actually energetically makes us more open to the same kind of behaviour. So it's not that thing where it's all on you because it's karma and stuff like that. That's a very, very incredibly annoying understanding of karma. No, it's actually because you've wanted to be open, and that openness has been exploited, it has created some damage in your energy field or some holes, some ways in that people who operate unconsciously pick up on and can lean on. And that's not to say the evil people, it's just to say that that's the way sometimes this This is the way it it works to operate in the unconscious. So if you can see that you've been a magnet for certain types of exploitative behaviour or borderline behaviour and things like that, it's a good idea to check, to work on, where are these entrances to make sure that you don't necessarily succumb to so many more of them. Because some people operate there and have no desire, have no desire to take care of it or don't understand that they are operating on you. So they're simply completely unconscious, that is, they're completely unaware that they're doing harm to other people. Um. So that would be my best guess. So what can it mean when I don't have it in me to take other people's pain on me? I say I said no to helping and being seen as cynical. Even if that's how my mum perceived my refusal. But I know it's something I just carry with me. Does that mean I have more masculine energy or rather a more balanced feminine energy? I've always wondered because there's such a rich conflict between my mum and me. Yes, you could say that, I would actually say that it's not there, it may well be that you're more of a feminine force compared to the way I can feel you manipulating me. I can sense that you want to blame me for your life. And then you want me to help you. I don't know right now. It may well be that you and it may also be that there's a barrier, there's a bond between you and your mother in relation to her wanting to be taken care of, and there's her unconscious, and you're resisting it. M, that's not my job. There can be a lot of things that go into it. So it doesn't have to be you, it can also be that you have a healthy masculinity. It may well be, but the fact that you've come in and it may well be that there are some non-soul agreements, but there are some different things that play out in the dynamic between the people we are born to and the people we interact with. And the trick is sometimes to recognise the dynamics and say, oh interesting, I can see this person is trying to hook me into helping. Now I actually start to pull the other way and say, no, it's not my responsibility. And that's not always nice for the person. And what happens when you want to get something out of another person, a person who is unconscious and wants you to give me care, give me love, give me financial support, give me help or whatever you can be here because I can't do it myself. That's one of the things that's underneath. So I'm a wretch, you have to help me. Uh, and we can all be the one reaching out for help. And that's healthy and good. A lot of people have it the other way round. They find it very difficult to reach out for help. But some people are trapped in helplessness and keep trying to squeeze things out of people in their patterns. And it feels quite uncomfortable. It feels very uncomfortable. So every time there's a guilt trip, you should and you're never home, and you never call and stuff like that, someone's trying to get something out of you, because you should be in a different way, because I'm not feeling well. And then you try to put some blame on yourself. And it's healthy to have a system that responds to that. Erm. And it's a bit different from sitting and talking to my friend and just being like, okay, I can feel that I have a wound in my heart because we hardly ever talk anymore. And I can also feel that you rarely reach out. And maybe we're just in a different place, or have you been busy? Well, there are many ways to communicate pain other than blame. There's something I'm having a hard time with. Deal with it. You have to make my pain go away by doing that, right? And of course there's also something about our parents being born in a different time. And stuff like that. So that's why we're on such a journey in terms of figuring out how the hell do we take better care of our emotional life and this whole give and take, this whole thing, it's something we're evolving with. What about when the light often feels more frighteningly unknown than the dark? Jen definitely. Definitely, definitely. Well, darkness is darkness can be scary and light can be scary as hell. Well, you could say if you've naturally moved. I find that some souls have had a deep, uh, not fascination with darkness, but have had a purpose in getting to know darkness. I mean really and and and not to teach at a school, but it's been something like the darkness needs to be known, where we can find our way up into the light, right? So some people have been more familiar with the dark than others, have experimented more in the dark than others and know their way around in it. Um, and that is to say, if as soon as we're very well versed in a place, we reach a point of saturation, well, now I'm familiar with it, now I'd like to move on to something else. And every time we operate some other frequencies, when they are new frequencies, they feel overwhelming. So it's really just about what we know best. So for me, I don't really know, I would say the frequency of my own power is scary for me. The unconditional love frequency I know like the back of my hand. And I just wanted to go up in a bubble and live in it all the time. And I was fucking terrified of the dark. And my husband can do that too. He's got to hold on tight when there's something bothering him. We need to go down and take a look at it. It's much better preserved in the dark. I'm just like, oh shit, I don't want to be down there. I think it's annoying. But there's nothing really to do. So you know, so it's not like you can kind of see it as a guidepost that we're more well-versed than any of that. And so it's really about becoming families and inviting in the new frequencies that we don't know so well. And that can be, for example, and for me it was also just finding out that when I actually released some of this, I actually got a lot of power up. And power is not the same as unconditional love. They are two different frequencies. Power is like that, so power coupled with unconditional love is insane though. You can put really, you can really be huge like say, no, but I'm not going to help you right now, for example. Or no, I don't want to. But it can come from a place where it's not a judgement. And there's no personal criticism of the other person. It's just like that, it's just like that, it's completely pure. So there will be new frequencies. There will be something we're not so well versed in. And it's actually about finding the courage again to say, okay, now I'm trying to be in it and bathe in it in dosages so that I can also explore that aspect of life. Laugh at that frequency, if you like. For example, will it help to work with the epigenetic, if uh if it's a parent in Yes, so I will I will yes actually epigenetic, but also and actually also to look at what it has done to them, because there are both the epigenetic things. So that is, if I'm working with a person who has been exposed to a lot of transgressive behaviour, for example for an adult. It doesn't have to be actual abuse, it can be psychological, it can be in some other way, where you are affected by yourself. You have always been required to give and there has been no room in who you are and things like that will have created various knots in the energy system that we can go in and work with and if you have already worked with it in counselling, you have seen and identified the patterns and all this work with some pain and liberation and everything else, you would have come a long way, right, and I can go in and look at okay, what kind of blockages has it created, what kind of you know what often happens when we cross boundaries is that we get some closures in the solar plexus that bypass the heart, which then goes up in such things, I'm going to try to act me. It hurts, it's uncomfortable. I have to try to explain myself or try to protect myself verbally or in some other way. And it can cause such fatigue in your head and so on and so forth, and you can be tricked quite quickly by other people, like you're constantly afraid of having your boundaries crossed. So you can work on that. And it will be from this life, so to speak, right? But it's not that important. It's not so important whether it's this life or the other life. What can happen is that when you first work with a theme, if that theme is quite painful, then Well, not always, but my experience is that sometimes it opens up to something that goes beyond this life. That, but not always. And you don't know that until you look at it. So it can be working with epigenetics, that is, what lies behind, but working on the energy system is also about actually repairing and patching holes and you know, ordered splits and things like that, which have arisen from the way we have been met in this life. I just find sometimes it goes deeper than that. Um, if you question that souls have tasks to learn, how do you view the idea that we meet the same souls over and over again. For example, our parents choose the way I see it. Well, we're I say, we're we're we're also here to learn then, but I see more that learning is a by-product. I'm not saying that it's the reason why we incarnate. I'm not saying that the reason to incarnate is to learn. I see that the reason to incarnate is actually because the soul has a deep deep deep longing to incarnate into a physical body. And the physical body has a deep longing to receive the soul. That's what I see. And to live that way and experience life that way. So I see that impulse of that, from that attempt to let that happen, all kinds of learning happens. So learning is a by-product. And it doesn't matter that we learn something. I mean, that's all well and good. But sometimes the problem is that what we learn sometimes causes souls to create soul ties. I could see that with my ex-husband, for example. I could see that there were deep deep deep ones we've known, I could see that we've gone you know way back many times. And there is a deep deep deep deep soul love. But I could also see that we really came to realise that many of the things we've learned over the years, because you can say, every time you have a life, this is my experience, now you are my interpretation of it, so I experience it. What I experience is that the more things you've experienced with another soul in incarnate form, the more karma builds up, which for me, karma is really more, it's like a magnetic attraction, so you kind of have a magnet, like how it's easier to find each other again, the more you've experienced together and you've learnt together. But one of the things you've learnt sometimes is to treat each other like shit. Because we incarnated at different times with very little consciousness. So there are a huge number today. Learning isn't just a matter of just saying no, it's so nice to meet an old friend again. There are also all sorts of old traumas, reaction patterns that come along as well, which you have learnt. So a lot of art is actually about unlearning. So, you know, for me it was both meeting someone who was very recognisable to me, while at the same time we had some dynamics that we landed a lot of it and stuff like that. It was really nice and good. But it was very, very interesting for me to see that God, well, it's mine, it's someone I know, so we have to be together. And it's just like that, but when I last started working, I can see, no, no, no, that's right. We met each other and there were all sorts of things here. But I could see that at some point we weren't going to be together anymore. So if I was on the soul path, there was deep love, but there were a lot of things we had to deal with together, because we had built up a lot of karma together through these lives that we had to work through. So I see it more that learning occurs and that when we meet each other again. Well, there is of course ample opportunity for all sorts of things to unfold. And I also realise that it's difficult for us to say that karma bonds feel crazy magnetic. Therefore, it doesn't always mean that if we meet someone, and I have to keep an eye on the time, that if we meet someone, we have to be with them. Now I can see there's another question, but we're 11 years old. D, I will, I'm not sure you have the question, I'm simply going to stop for now, because you also have to, you have to continue the text. Um, but I'll I'll I'll I'll answer your question in there in writing, because now I'll let go differently here, because I had promised to finish at 12 o'clock. But speaking of the island with how you meet as souls and soul ties and soul agreements and stuff like that, it may well be something I do a little lecture at some point, because compared to how I have seen it and had it told in such you know in spiritual themes, then my own experience has been expanded a lot. And that's not to say that my experience is true, but it can possibly also provide some fragments that yes, we are learning something together, but right now it's actually about sometimes unlearning some of the things we've learnt together. It's actually about breaking some dynamics that have arisen because of the learning we've had together, where learning becomes a by-product of spirit incarnating in the desire to and and incarnating all the way to the big toe. It's great to see you. Thank you so much for now.